Although luckily this one has so far been going fast! Summer break is already almost over, school starts on August 1st.
Toward the end of August will be the half way point! I'm not sure why, but I always feel better when we reach the half way mark in Deployments. I tell myself, I have made it this far, it's only downhill from here! Once the number of days he has been gone is larger than the number of days till he gets home, I feel better. Is that weird? Every deployment and separation I have looked forward to the half way mark.
It really is true, it's the little things you miss... I find myself smelling his clothes in our closet. I steal his t-shirts and wear them to sleep in. If were not going anywhere that day, I sometimes use his body-wash or cologne so I smell like him. I have been wearing his wedding ring on a necklace just to feel closer to him. I count the days in between phone calls. I hate being alone every evening, night after night. I don't mind being alone sometimes, but after a while it just gets lonely.
The kids say they miss daddy and it breaks my heart. We all need him and miss him so much. Sadly they are used to him being gone... So am I, I may get used to it, but it doesn't make it any easier, I just now know how to deal with it. How not to fall to pieces every time he leaves. How to hold myself together and keep going. To keep things as normal as possible for my kids and my own sanity. I know how to be a single parent.